When You Secretly Feel Jealous of Other Christians

The other day I caught myself rolling my eyes so hard they nearly flew out of my skull.

Why? Because a Christian influencer I follow just casually posted a story of her in Italy, sipping espresso outside a picturesque chapel, captioned with something like, “just grateful Jesus led me here.” Meanwhile, I was trying to hear God’s voice over the sound of my neighbour drilling through concrete at 8am. And yes, I was wearing the same shirt three days in a row. So.

There it was: the creeping jealousy. Not holy envy. Not admiration. Plain, green-eyed, low-key-hate-following jealousy. And it wasn’t just about the lifestyle or the opportunities. It was about her joy. Her clarity. Her call. Her collagen.

It made me wonder: What happens when you're a Christian... and you're jealous of other Christians?

It sounds petty. It feels embarrassing. But it’s a thing. A real, ugly, soul-squirmy thing.

Jealousy? In this economy?

You’d think being part of the family of God would feel like a big warm potluck where everyone brings something, and nobody’s comparing potato salads. But in reality? Sometimes it feels like you brought a soggy sandwich while the girl across the room showed up with a Pinterest-perfect charcuterie board and a prophecy about your future.

There’s that worship leader who always looks airbrushed and cries beautifully during bridge number three. That friend who got her dream ministry job while you’re still trying to make Canva devotionals go viral. Or the ex-party boy turned preacher who gets thousands of views for saying the same thing you journaled last week, but he said it with better lighting.

We know in theory we’re on the same team. But when the algorithm seems to be blessing someone else’s calling way more than yours? That “rejoice with those who rejoice” verse feels more like a test than a lifestyle.

Why does this happen though?

Let’s break it down without pretending we’re above it.

Jealousy sneaks in when we think God’s blessings are limited. Like He’s running some divine giveaway and you missed the entry window. Suddenly, someone else’s breakthrough feels like your rejection. Someone else’s calling feels like proof that yours is... maybe a bit less shiny.

But here's the kicker: deep down, jealousy is rarely about the other person. It’s about what their life triggers in us. The insecurities. The doubts. The timelines we thought we’d be on by now. The wounds we thought were healed but apparently weren’t because they just flared up at the sight of a girl with perfect handwriting posting her morning Bible study on Instagram again.

The worst part?

You can’t exactly talk about it. I mean, what are you going to say?

“Hey, can you pray for me? I’m lowkey bitter that God seems to like your aesthetic more than mine.”

Or, “Hey, I’ve been struggling with coveting your calling. Also, your bangs look amazing. Anyway.”

It’s not like you want to be this person. You want to cheer others on. You want to be secure. But the feelings are real. And ignoring them just means they fester in weird, toxic, sanctified-looking ways.

God is not stingy

If you get anything from this article, get this:

God is not stingy with His goodness.

His calling on someone else’s life doesn’t cancel out His calling on yours. He’s not sitting in heaven dishing out random story arcs like, “Let’s make this girl famous and this one... quietly obedient forever. Mwahaha.”

That’s not how He works.

His love is personal. Tailored. Intentional. And yes, sometimes it looks wildly unequal from the outside. But the cross already proved He’s not playing favourites. He gave everything for all of us. Not just for the ones who look good doing it on Reels.

What helped me

Honestly? I had to confess it.

Not just in a vague “Lord help me not be jealous” kind of way. But in a “God, I’m genuinely struggling to be happy for her, and I feel pathetic and petty and gross” kind of way. And shocker: He wasn’t mad. He didn’t shame me. He met me there.

Jealousy loses power when it’s dragged into the light.

I also started blessing the people I envied. Like, on purpose. Out loud. Sometimes gritting my teeth through it, but still. Because blessing shifts the heart. It reminds me that we’re all just vessels. And that if someone else is being used powerfully, it’s still for God’s glory. Which means I’m on the winning team anyway.

And lastly, I reminded myself that God doesn’t want a knock-off version of anyone else. He wants me. My weird humour. My messy process. My awkward walk with Him that doesn’t photograph well but is still wildly precious to Him.

Jealousy is the enemy’s trap

Let’s call it what it is.

Jealousy is a bait.

It tempts you to see fellow believers as rivals instead of siblings. It shifts your gaze from God to others. It poisons your joy and distorts your purpose. And worst of all, it makes you feel like God is holding out on you.

But the truth is, the more time you spend cultivating your own soil, the less time you have to stare over someone else’s fence.

P.S. You don’t know the whole story

Seriously. You don’t.

That girl with the perfect Sunday morning selfies? She might be battling anxiety every night. That guy with the booming ministry? He might be feeling emptier than ever. That couple that just bought a house and said “God provided”? They might be drowning in fear and secretly googling “how to tithe when your mortgage is 80% of your paycheck.”

You see a highlight reel. God sees the full, unedited cut.

Don’t waste your life envying someone else’s trailer when God is still writing your script.

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FAQ

Q: Why do I get jealous of other Christians?

A: You might feel jealous of other Christians because it seems like God is blessing them more visibly, whether through opportunities, influence, or clarity of calling. When someone else’s life looks like a spiritual success story and yours feels quiet or confusing, it can trigger insecurity and the fear that you’ve been overlooked.

But jealousy is rarely about the other person. It usually reveals an inner ache, like unhealed disappointment, comparison fatigue, or a skewed view of God’s character. We start thinking His love is conditional or limited, as if someone else’s blessing is evidence of our lack. The solution isn’t to shame yourself for feeling that way. It’s to get curious about where the envy is pointing. Often, it’s a sign God wants to do deeper heart work. Not punish you, but free you.

Q: How to stop being jealous of others' success biblically?

A: To stop being jealous of others’ success, the Bible teaches us to renew our minds with truth, rejoice with those who rejoice (Romans 12:15), and fix our eyes on God, not on people. Instead of measuring your worth by someone else’s highlight reel, root your identity in Christ, who doesn’t compare His children but calls each one uniquely.

Practically, that means confessing jealousy honestly to God, meditating on scriptures about His goodness and faithfulness, and intentionally blessing those you envy. Gratitude is also a powerful biblical weapon against envy. When you regularly thank God for what you do have, it shifts your heart from lack to abundance. Over time, this cultivates joy in your own journey instead of resentment over someone else’s.

Q: Does God favor some people more than others?

A: No, God does not favor some people more than others. Scripture is clear that He shows no partiality (Acts 10:34, Romans 2:11). His love, grace, and salvation are offered equally to all, regardless of status, success, or spiritual gifting.

What we often interpret as “favor” might simply be a different calling, timing, or assignment. God knows each of us intimately and works uniquely in our lives for His purposes. While someone else’s blessings may look bigger or flashier, it doesn’t mean God loves them more. His ways are higher than ours, and His version of “favor” often includes things the world doesn’t see, like character, perseverance, and quiet obedience.

Q: How do I find contentment in my life?

A: You find contentment by anchoring your identity in Christ, not in your circumstances. Philippians 4:11–13 teaches that true contentment comes from knowing Jesus deeply. Not from achieving more, having what others have, or reaching some perfect version of your life.

Biblical contentment grows when you trust that God’s plan for you is good, even if it’s different from what you imagined. Practicing gratitude, letting go of comparison, and focusing on daily obedience rather than long-term outcomes can reframe your whole perspective. Contentment doesn’t mean giving up on growth, it means living from peace instead of striving for it.

Read more if you’re spiralling:

• What If Your Calling Feels… Meh?
• Why Some Christians Secretly Feel Disappointed in God
• Is It Biblical to Want to Travel the World?
• How to Hear God’s Voice

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Okay, now it’s your turn.

Have you ever accidentally wanted someone else’s calling? Or scrolled past another Christian's post and felt the urge to throw your phone across the room, just a little?

Tell me below. No judgment. I’ll be right there in the comment section too, repenting and rehydrating.